Go on, then - make me laugh!

Sitting in an arena with a few thousand other people watching British funnyman Lee Evans on a very cold Tuesday night was pretty comforting. Not because I was wrapped in three layers of clothes, nor attending with my better half (although, that too :p) but because he was just goddamn funny. Still goddamn funny.

I remember watching one of his first stand-up videos that he released a good few years ago now, and I remember taking a while to tune in to his sense of humour. Once I understood it, I never stopped laughing. It was comforting to see on Tuesday night that he'd lost none of his charm, charisma or downright enthausiasm and passion for what he does. He's still just as manic and enjoyable as when I first saw that video. Fair enough he tends to crack jokes about the same sort of topics, but he had different things to say and different observations.

Unlike Eddie Izzard. Now don't get me wrong, Eddie is probably my favourite stand-up comic of all time, but I can't help but feel that since his glory days of Unrepeatable, Dressed To Kill, Glorious and Definite Article he hasn't had a whole lot to say. He maybe rode on his 'thing' of being quite placid and just saying random words in order to get a laugh during his Circle and Sexie tours. He used to have momentous political stories, turned into comic tales making the most boring (and at the same time horrific) political events laugh-out-loud funny. He gave humerous personas to domesticated animals, and created new world events born out of real historial happenings with a touch-in-cheek twist.

Ich bin ein Berliner!

Come back, Eddie!

Who says shopping can't be fun?

I was in Tesco a couple of weeks ago, calmly perusing the selection of cheap DVDs they had to offer (True Romance for £1.50 anyone?), when a stern female voice sounded over the tannoy..

Could a duty manager please report to the customer services desss whhooooooOOOOPPP!!!

Like a scene from War Of The Worlds, everyone around me stopped browsing the shelves and stopped shoving food into their already overflowing baskets, and slowly turned to face the front of the shop, eyes gazing to the ceiling as if some other-worldly monster was bellowing it's mating call from the top of a tall building.

Tannoy Woman tried again.

*Ahem* Could a duty manager please repoaaahahahahahahahahahAHAHAHAH!!!

This time it was clear that someone standing behind the speaker was tickling her. Bemused stares turned to englightened grins, before returning to their fruit and veg and dairy products, sniggering as they went. A wry grin crept over my face as I went back to the DVD selection, and a second female voice appeared over the tannoy:

*Sigh*. Could a duty manager please report to the customer services desk? Thank you.

Who would have the courage to do that sort of thing whilst someone else was addressing was what essentially the population of a small village over a loudspeaker? Not me, but I'm glad someone did.

Time for a change

Lying in bed last night, unable to sleep, I was silently analysing my lifestyle. I realised that I must spend at least 90% of my day sitting, or lying down:

  • Driving to work every day (30 mins)
  • Working (8 hours)
  • Sitting down at home due to being tired after sitting down at work all day. Usually during this period I'll do some web programming, or work some more.
  • Make dinner. No wait, make far too much dinner. This one involves some standing up.
  • Eat dinner (sitting down again)
  • I might make some music (mostly sitting, but sometimes standing)
  • Play some Xbox
  • Sleep (lying down)

I make too much food for what I actually need, and as a result of all this sitting down and eating too much my tits are too big, my ass is too fat and I can't be bothered to do a lot of things which don't involve sitting down.

This mostly started once I learned to drive; since then I haven't been bothered about standing up.

So, a change of plan is needed. I can't afford to go to a gym, so I'll need to improvise with getting myself motivated to exercise any way I can. I enjoy walking, and some of the walks around where I live are pretty good. I need to watch what I eat and not feel like eating everything put in front of me. I need to not work at home and make more time for other things, like exercise.

I need to eat healthily. To be honest, I don't eat badly anyway, but it can be improved.

My first goal? Just to lose a few kilograms and feel a bit more active. That's a start. My brother's looking trim these days and has decent habits, so if I could be more like him I'll be happy.

Apart from the dodgy haircut and tendancy to steal other people's women, that is.

Wish me luck!